"To hell, to hell with balance! I break glasses; I want to burn, even if I break myself. I want to live only for ecstasy. I’m neurotic, perverted, destructive, fiery, dangerous - lava, inflammable, unrestrained."
Hiding Places - Jack Micheline →
There are hiding places in my room
where beautiful poems are hidden
Poems hidden away in boxes
on sheets of brown paper
Poems of spirit and magic
workers hands hidden in boxes
there are blue skies hidden in my room
dolphins and seagulls
the heaving of breasts and oceans
there are skies in my room
"At night too, she puzzled the mystery of her desperate need of kindness. As other girls prayed for handsomeness in a lover, or for wealth, or for power, or for poetry, she had prayed fervently: let him be kind."
#henry and june
Remind me… what is the point of all this life I have been blessed with?
#life is hard
HEY GOD, IT’S ME.
I COULD REALLY, REALLY, REALLY USE SOME GOOD NEWS. SOON. Because I am having a really, really, really hard time dealing with all the not-so-good news, disappointment and all around plain old shitty shit that consumes my life.
And if good news is not in store for me right now, that’s fine. I accept that and all (which is why I’m not ASKING for good news). But if that’s the case, can you please just give me the strength to get through TODAY without losing my damn mind?
Because I’ve spent way too many days in bed in tears or hysterical in the shower or sleeping my life away over the last week or so… and I just can’t get out of this funk on my own.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
"To be recognized as a feminist is to be assigned to a difficult category and a category of difficulty. You are “already read” as “not easy to get along with” when you name yourself as a feminist. You have to show that you are not difficult through displaying signs of good will and happiness. Frye alludes to such experiences when she describes how: “this means, at the very least, that we may be found to be “difficult” or unpleasant to work with, which is enough to cost one’s livelihood.” We can also witness an investment in feminist unhappiness (the myth that feminists kill joy because they are joy-less). There is a desire to believe that women become feminists because they are unhappy. This desire functions as a defense of happiness against feminist critique. This is not to say that feminists might not be unhappy; becoming a feminist might mean becoming aware of just how much there is to be unhappy about. Feminist consciousness could be understood as consciousness of unhappiness, a consciousness made possible by the refusal to turn away. My point here would be that feminists are read as being unhappy, such that situations of conflict, violence, and power are read as about the unhappiness of feminists, rather than being what feminists are unhappy about."
"You are enough. Paint it on your mirrors, on the back of your eyelids, drown it in your stomach, sing it in every word you say. You are never too much. Eat your food, sleep eight hours, walk like you love yourself. You are enough. Say it in your sleep, mantras to carry you through your day. There is never enough of you. You are a thirst that is never quenched. I crave you when you’re away. I love every piece of you. But I cannot make you love yourself."